SOLILOQUIES:Forbidden Pleasure

No it wasn't love at first sight. I wasn't flattered by his charm and interest in me. I tried to ignore him and turned down his relationship proposal countless times.

I wasn't having any of it - a destined for failure relationship shrouded in secrecy and guilt. A roving fire of passion and lust bound to leave everyone burned out. An abominable liaison - or so I thought.

But he had been relentless, plying me with gifts and acts of kindness, making me change my mind, making my cold broken heart start to beat again.

"No it can't be him!" Common sense had warned my heart. "Anybody else but him."


But my heart proved a traitor when it beat triple time at the sight of him. Common sense was eroded over feelings when the butterflies danced wild in my tummy at the sound of his voice; when my eyes lit up after our first kiss; when I started finding him cute even with his chipped front tooth.

Amor vincit omnia

Does love truly conquer all?

Its been one year since we first met...one year since I first got introduced to the handsome, shy guy who was always washing the family car every morning on my way out. Even then he seemed geeky. The greeting and complimenting as I passed everyday soon became a routine. A routine that had to be broken when he went back to complete his service year after the Easter holidays. It felt sudden the way he left and I was unhappy about it for a few days.

I eventually saw him again at a friend's party a few months later and we continued being friends - like we'd never parted. He, in an uncharacteristic show of emotion later said he liked me and would want us to be more than friends but there was a major setback. I was already going out with someone else - his elder brother.

We could be nothing but friends until his brother went to America to seek greener pastures and forget his past. His past included me.

Now here I am, the spurned lover still grieving the abrupt end of my relationship and b**ching about men being worse than b**ches. But he's trying his best to right a wroong and redeem the male folk in my sight.

This is an abomination, a relationship doomed for failure but I don't care anymore. After all, what is life without its healthy dose of forbidden pleasures? I ask myself as I reply his final proposal with the three-letter ominous word, "Yes."